20 Ways to Say Happy Birthday


20  Ways to Say “Happy Birthday”

Please use these at your own perl, or as an inspiration to write something original of your own, to displace the mindless, repetitive flood of banality that fills our social walls one day a year.

  1. Happy birthday to you and 1 in 365 people worldwide.
  2. I wish you a happier birthday than anyone else has wished you.
  3. Happy increased-likelihood-of-getting-special treatment.
  4. Enjoy the dash between the two dates on your tombstone.
  5. If you count the day you were born as your first birthday, you are a year older than you think you are.
  6. Didn’t we just celebrate this like a year ago?
  7. Happity birdie.
  8. Another year, another 584 million trip around the sun. May your next 584 million miles be your best yet.
  9. Happy oldieth birthday.
  10. I noticed in the right column of my Facebook timeline that today is your birthday. I am now writing a message of acknowledgement and well-wishes, as is the socially appropriate custom.
  11. hpy bdy
  12. Time for your birthday tickles!
  13. Happy oldest-you-have-ever-been and youngest-you-will-ever-be-again day.
  14. Half a yappy bidet!
  15. Another year without dying. Good on you!
  16. He drank alone. It was your birthday, but that didn’t matter. He sat at the typewriter and wrote. None of it was very good. —If Hemingway wrote you “Happy Birthday”.
  17. Happy older you day.
  18. Defriend all of those who did not recognize the anniversary of your existence.
  19. May the best of your birthdays be today, and today be the least of those yet to come.
  20. Happy anniversary of the day you were abruptly brought forth from the warm comfort of your mother’s womb into this cold, unforgiving world.
  21. Happy better than the alternative.

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